Strong anxious thoughts

Had an incident where I had two conscious triggers. There may have been others that I had missed. These annoyed me for the best part of yesterday. One thing that became clear is that these thoughts are driven by fear shame and threat of violence. They take up a lot of attention and have a large mental mass.when i get into this state there is a stuckness and a difficulty in moving forward in a meaningful way; my brain seems simply overwhelmed. I look for ways to neutralise these thoughts and sometimes these work temporarily. 

 Trying to neutralise these thoughts keeps the neutralisation circuits open and is ultimately unhelpful in the long term. The situation involved a difference of opinion with someone,there was no verbal altercations or explicit threats of violence, it was what most people would do in a day and what politicians make a living at. 

 so this mental mass has its own internal existence for me and consists of a miasma of jumbled thoughts, and feelings with no means of unpicking it. emotionally it is draining. These jumbled thoughts and fears are very strong and tend to pull in other stuff. 

 I need to have downtime when this happens and do some relaxation- this helps things to settle ;then sensible thoughts can be allowed to rise and sometimes the odd cognition or awareness happens which can help to shift my mental state to a different level. I found myself rushing for reassurance this morning which i am trying not to beat myself up about...... 

 It is easy to get overwhelmed if you have CPTSD symptoms... 

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